25 January 2008

I Can Cut My Own Meat

I’m sick of being the outcast
I’m sick of having no friends
I’m sick of feeling inadequate
I'm sick of being the ugly one
I’m sick of “Are you new?”
I’m sick of your judgments
I’m sick of you not being happy for me
I’m sick of your dirty looks—I saw you
I’m sick of you not talking to me
I’m sick of being the nice one
I’m sick of you being mean to me
I’m sick of trying so hard to fit in
I’m sick of trying so hard to make friends
I’m just plain sick of trying
I’m sick of wondering what’s wrong with me
I’m sick of feeling sad
I’m sick of putting on my happy face

I think I’m getting sick

I’ll probably delete this in a few minutes, when my guilt or my worry or my embarrassment or my fears sink in, or when I get that one mean comment, but for now, let it be said…We’ll see.

8 comments:

Lindsee said...

Kelly! I'm your friend!! And I think you are awesome! You are so fun and you make me laugh. Don't get sick:(

kemra said...

I hope you don't get sick - that really stinks! I wish that I didn't live a million miles away, or I would come and kidnap you and take you for some yummy icecream, and fun girl time!

You are amazing, and beautiful, and SO fun to be around! I love you!

donelle said...

Oh sad! Pretty sure I feel the same way a lot of times! I'm excited to come and play with you tonight! One of my goals this year is to play with you more often!

heather said...

I'm so sorry you have to live in UTAH!! cross your fingers and hope because I really want to be coming!!

And all the "sick ofs" are so normal. I think it's every gal's thoughts sometimes...so please tell my its just sometimes and not every day??

You are great!

Cory & Kristyn said...

why the hell do we all have the same thoughts, you would think that because we all feel this way that we could make it better or easier!! its high school BS!! we are all adults STOP! im with you Kelly. Utah doesnt help either. i remember when we used to hang out, i had fun with you, i would chill with you right now it we lived next to each other! :)

heather said...

school. if we can get in. :)

Cory & Kristyn said...

my husband thinks blogs are stupid, i think alot of the "families" that blog do it just so they can show off everything they have. i understand lady! we need to keep in touch! last time i say Neil it was that time at the mall, i have no clue what or who hes up to these days, i guess the married life as made my own little world and i kind of like staying in it! you know what i mean? really though we need keep intouch!!!!!

kemra said...

I got your miles added - sorry it took so long! I just posted a new thing about changing the location - so take a look and let me know what you think - nothing is set in stone or anything, and I think we are going to do a "majority wins" type of deal. We are not deciding any time soon either. Just trying to get some ideas of what people think!

PS, I miss you - I want you to come so bad!

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